Finding Freedom
September - 2011
Dear Friend,
After a summer hiatus, I am back to Action on Purpose. I am very excited about a new project that has taken much of my time over the summer months: the production of an eBook on how to age well in the 21st century, aimed at a broad audience of Boomers. It is a collaborative effort of many thought leaders in the fields of Positive Aging and Life Planning, and the various chapter drafts I have read are great stuff! Stay tuned – we hope to be ready to release it by the end of 2011. I will make sure you, my readers, have swift and free access to this great resource!
The purpose of this newsletter is to share with you simple and effective tools for personal, spiritual and professional growth. I have used these tools in my own life, so I know their power as well as their challenges. I have also utilized them in more than thirty years of professional work with others as a life coach, educator and psychotherapist. I offer them to you to try, adapt, and practice as methods to nurture your own growth.
Please send this issue to any friends who might be interested.
Also, I would welcome your thoughts or comments on this newsletter. I truly appreciate your participation in this Action on Purpose Community!
Warmly,
Natalie
P.S. Interested in some support in clarifying your purpose or taking action on your purpose? Contact me for a complimentary coaching call to explore whether coaching could help you reach your goals!
“Freedom’s just another word for
nothing left to lose...”
~ Janis Joplin
Freedom is such a valued condition, and often won at great cost. The political revolution that created the USA – as well as other revolutions taking place even now across the globe – provide examples of the cost and effort of finding freedom. This month, I want to focus on a quieter, inner freedom that is available to each of us in the here and now. This kind of freedom takes effort and courage to find, as well – but in a very different way.
As a young woman, I had a powerful dream about landing in a prison yard, and being aware that my mission was to remind other prisoners of the spiritual freedom they have access to, even within the confines of the prison. The risk was that I would forget this truth myself, and become truly confined within the prison walls. This dream has stayed powerful for me across the years, and informs my own sense of purpose in my life and work with others.
Here are a few perspectives that I have found useful in assisting myself and others to find freedom in the present moment. These involve exploring what we want freedom from, why we want freedom, and how to find freedom within our current circumstances.
Freedom From
One dimension of freedom is to learn how to loosen our attachment to habits and patterns that get in the way of embracing our freedom. These may be patterns of thought or behavior that are so well-practiced that they become unconscious defaults. Some examples may be defensive anger, overeating when stressed, or a poor self-image that prevents motivation to exercise or care for our bodies in other ways. More extreme examples include addictions - to alcohol, drugs, work, shopping, sex or the Internet – that fuel our cravings and become obsessive obstacles in our lives.
Freeing ourselves from one of these attachments involves honest reflection on our lives, and a growing awareness of how this pattern or behavior limits our lives or sabotages our intentions. Often, we need to make changes that provide support for us to let go – and seeking help is an action only we can take to begin the process of finding freedom from our identified obstacles. Help can be in the form of a friend, a self-help group such as a 12-Step Program or Weight-Watchers, or a professional (such as a psychotherapist or other healing service provider) who can guide us on the path of letting go.
Letting go, in order to find freedom from something (or someone) we have become attached to, takes time. It is a process with many steps, including practicing new patterns that replace the old ones. It can take considerable time to identify what and how a pattern is truly confining us – and take courage to decide to let go of something we have identified with for a long time. The effort, though, is well worth it!
“We shrink back from freedom because
in freedom there is no belonging,
except to all…
Freedom is not a speculative, romantic game
of imagining what is not.
It is simply comprehension of what is.”
~ Vimala Thakar, from The Eloquence of Living
Freedom To
Freedom is not an end in itself, it is a condition that allows us to make choices, to take action, and to experience joy and fulfillment. What is it you want the freedom to do or feel?
For many, freedom can be experienced as a burden – “too many choices.”
- What do I really want? What matters to me?
- What is my purpose or calling in life?
- How can I serve?
These are questions that trouble those with the greatest freedom to choose. Though inspiration can come from considering the lives of others, our personal answers to these questions lie within us.
Finding the answers within is, like letting go, a process – one that continues to develop with our self-reflection, understanding, and courage. Having a regular practice that supports ongoing reflection is very helpful here. The external press to achieve in worldly ways and attain material goods distracts us from this kind of reflection.
There is a surge in these questions now among Baby Boomers who are moving from midlife toward the traditional age of “retirement.” With the national life span increasing almost 30 years from 1900 to the present, these Boomers have the freedom of what social entrepreneur Marc Freedman calls the “Encore years:” a whole new life stage of healthy productivity not available to previous generations.
Today, in part due to the needs of the Boomers, resources abound to help you clarify your purpose and determine what you want to do with your freedom. One such resource I would recommend is the work and writing of Richard Leider. Working with a Life Coach is another excellent way to jumpstart your process for discovering what you want freedom to do or experience.
"Tell me, what do you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?"
~ Mary Oliver from The Summer Day
Freedom With
Another dimension of freedom is the capacity to experience our freedom while engaged with the world – in a relationship, with a particular job or activity, in groups of various sizes. Freedom has often been conceptualized as freedom from the constraints of the world or relationships, or the freedom to take individual actions. However, we live in an interdependent world, where all aspects of our lives are connected with the natural world, the events in our ever shrinking global village, and the mundane interactions of our daily lives.
How can we experience greater freedom, today, in our current circumstances? One way is to nurture our acceptance for the way things are – to be grateful for what is working well in a relationship, or in a job, and embrace the truth of what isn’t working so well. Often, we can become so attached to what is wrong that we lose perspective on what is right with something.
Another way is to take steps to increase the degree of freedom we feel in our current circumstances. One client, wanting to find a new job because of her dissatisfaction with her current one, gained considerable freedom by redesigning her cubical space and using headphones as she worked, significantly reducing the number of interruptions she experienced from coworkers. This resulted in greater productivity on the job, greater confidence in her capacity to set limits, and also more free time to explore other job opportunities from her desk on lunch hours.
“You have freedom when you're easy in your harness.”
~Robert Frost
~ Action On Purpose Challenge ~
- Reflect on your answers to these questions:
- What do I want freedom from?
- What do I want freedom to do, to be, or to experience?
- What do I want more freedom with – something, or someone, in my current life?
- Determine one step you can take today toward freedom, and begin that journey!
“Between stimulus and response there is a space.
In that space is our power to choose our response.
In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”
~Viktor E. Frankl
~ In the News ~
Next Steps - Want to get going on a plan for the kind of life you want to lead in the future? The 2Young2Retire course can help. A certified facilitator, I offer the course by tele-conference. If you are interested in more information about the course and updates on the time and starting date, go to http://actiononpurpose.com/2008/04/30/boomers--whats-next-for-you.aspx
Would you like to share your kind words about Natalie's coaching, facilitating, speaking or writings? If so, please send them to testimonial@EldridgeWorks.com. We gratefully welcome your comments.
At www.EldridgeWorks.com, my virtual professional home, you will find information about coaching and psychotherapy services, as well as more about me. I would love to hear your comments about the website, or the Action on Purpose newsletter. Contact me at Natalie@EldridgeWorks.com.
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